Jocu

When I was little I wanted a pet dog. Anytime I would ask for one my dad would say "We have dogs."

We didn't have pet dogs. We had hunting dogs. That lived outside. And would go off in the woods days on end. I wanted a cute little dog that would live inside with me and be my best friend. I domesticated every other animal on the farm. I had a pet duck that I would carry around tucked up under my arm. I had my pet sheep Spider. We had a pet raccoon for a little while. And always tons of feral cats that I would tame.

One Wednesday evening, as everyone was gathering for Seminary and other church meetings, my friends the Blau's brought a pile of puppies to give away. They were plump, fluffy little black and white creatures. I feel instantly in love.

On this same fateful day, my mother just happened to purchase a small pure-bred toy poodle. My dad had said no to the mutts, but when my mother drove into the church parking lot with a paid-for dog, how could they reasonably say no to a free one?

I picked out the fluffiest little one of the bunch and named him Jocu. Yes, a reworking of Cujo. They looked like little miniature black&white St. Bernards. I loved Jocu so much.

When I moved out on my own, at the age of 16, I thought I was mature enough to take on the world. When I look back on my journal entries for that time, the most thing I talked about was missing Jocu who had to stay behind.

This morning I woke up to an empty house. Last night I found a new home for Maltie and Pennywhistle. I know the new family will love them just as much as I, and for the cats they'll be happy with who ever loves, feeds and snuggles with them. But it is quiet here and I expect to see them at every turn. It was strange to turn open the shades and not have to pull them up so the cats can look out the window. And to brush my teeth without them sticking their head into the running water.

They have been loving and faithful companions through three very lonely and difficult years. I will miss them very much. I may be getting gray hair and a few wrinkles, but I haven't really changed much since I was sixteen years old.